Staring Across the Bridge
by sparklepop777
Summary: Addison says goodbye to Mark, ending one chapter, beginning another, but never forgetting the past. Oneshot.


**And as I begin studying for finals, you might expect some new chapters and A LOT of oneshots, because frankly, I have the attention span of a three-year-old when it comes to finals. And I have to take out the stress somewhere. And this has been bugging me all day.**

**Basically, I saw the finale of Grey's and Addison never really said goodbye to anyone, and it made me really sad, because it wasn't like she hated anyone at that hospital, and I thought that they deserved _something_, you know? So anyway, I typed this out. I thought Mark and Addison needed a little more closure. (And I needed a lot, lol) Hope you like it!**

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**They had done this so many times that she was having trouble remembering where she was, getting lost in the staring, the memories. And yet, here they were again, both of them. This was their beginning and their end. She would have cried, but she knew she was doing the right thing. 

"So you're leaving," he said. "You're leaving for…something different."

Scratch that. She was crying. "Mark, I have to. I need this. I need something different." This was hurting her as much as it was hurting him, but that was how they worked. They hurt each other.

And now they were staring at each other again because neither of them knew how to cross this broken bridge. Neither of them wanted to burn it, though. She was just going to turn around and walk away.

Addison turned and nodded to Joe. They were going to need another drink.

"Say something, Mark."

"I can't."

"Why?"

"You're not going to want to hear it."

She smiled at him through the tears trying to force their way out of her eyes. "What else could you possibly do to me?" she asked. "It's okay. Just get it out of the way. Let it go. Let me go." The look on her face broke his heart.

"I love you."

She covered her face with her hands. "No, you don't. Don't say that."

"I mean it."

"But you…"

"I didn't."

She looked shocked. "Then why…"

"Isn't it obvious? I was letting you go. Is that so hard for you to believe, that I would do something like that?"

"God, I don't know! I don't know anything anymore!" The fight against the tears was one she was slowly losing. She took a deep breath. "Damn it, Mark. I don't want to leave like this," she said. "I don't want to be mad at you. Please don't be mad at me."

"I'm not mad at you." He didn't think he could be mad at her. If he was in her position, he'd probably do the same thing. It was something all three of them were good at, fighting then running away. Derek had done it first. And now Addison was about to do it again. He had no right to be asking her to stay when he was one of the reasons she had to leave.

"I just can't stay when there's nothing to fight for anymore." There was more silence, more staring.

"Why didn't you fight for us?"

"There was nothing to fight for," she answered slowly. "Look at me. My priorities were screwed up, and I'm paying for it. But I'm not going to do it anymore. I need to find out what to do, and I need somewhere where I can THINK. I…I have to think about myself for once because I think I've forgotten how. And…I can't think with you. I can't waste any more time. You're a good person, Mark. We just…I don't think we can."

"You're the only person who's ever seen me as good."

"And you are. Listen…" She leaned a little closer. "You need to let this go. Don't do what I did. You have time. You don't have to end up angry and alone. Please, don't end up like that. I want you to be happy. And maybe, maybe you can figure out how to do that."

Mark got up and put his jacket on.

"Are you leaving?" Part of her wished that he would because it would make everything so much easier.

"I never left you before, and I'm not leaving you now. Let's go…walk…I can't stay in here." She threw a couple of dollars on the bar and put on her coat.

They ended up circling the hospital. It figured.

"Are you staying?" she asked.

"I don't exactly have anywhere to go. Are you going to visit?"

Addison laughed hollowly. "I don't think so…for a while, at least. But, you never know, I might have to fly up here."

"Don't get too much of a tan."

"What?"

"Don't get too much of a tan. It doesn't suit you."

She smiled a little. "Okay, I promise I won't turn into one of those beach girls, okay? But you have to promise me that you won't break any more hearts. God forbid you get run out of here too. Be happy. You deserve to be happy, okay?"

He wrapped his arm around her, pulling her to his side. She didn't fight it. They used to do it all the time. "Are you sure you want to do this?"

She smiled sadly. "Yes. It will be better for everyone. If you haven't noticed, we tend to stir things up wherever we go."

"Seattle could handle the two of us."

She laughed. "I don't know about that. Poor New York had way too much of us, I think. And besides, it'll give everyone some space. Without me, it'll feel less crowded. And believe me, the drama won't be missed."

Mark laughed at that. "You won't be forgotten." They stopped in front of the doors of Seattle Grace, looking up at it before turning toward the park across the street.

"I won't forget anyone either, okay? Are you happy?"

"Not really. You're still leaving."

She laughed again. "You won't give up, will you?"

"When have I ever?" She was slowly steering him to her car; it was time for her to go. "You've said goodbye to everyone else?"

"Yeah," said Addison. "I'm not THAT cold and heartless." They remained silent the rest of her way to the car. Once they got there, they each took a deep breath, turning to face each other. Addison hugged him, which surprised him. It had always been physical with them, but this gesture was more than physical. It was friendly. He hugged her back.

"Take care of Derek," she said. "And watch out for Meredith…watch out for all of them. I won't be around to kick your ass when you start treating them like slaves."

"Okay. And you know, if things don't work out in LA…there's always room in this hell hole."

She laughed. "I'll keep that in mind." They pulled away.

"Thank you…for everything," she said.

"No, thank you."

She unlocked her car. "There may be hope for you yet, Mark Sloan."

"You'll always be my favorite redhead." They smiled.

"I better be."

"You're a good person, too, you know," he said. "You deserve a second chance."

Her arms were still around his neck. "You know what? Talk to me in a couple of years, when we both know what we want. Who knows what will happen?"

He grinned. "Does that mean you're leaving the door open?"

"It's more like…me sticking my shoe in the door, but sure. Why not? Are we good?"

"We're always good."

Addison sighed and turned to her car. "I'm going to need to beat the morning traffic."

"Take care of yourself."

Addison smiled and opened the door of her car. "You too."

"So," said Mark, "how do we say goodbye?"

And it really was something to think about. They had to acknowledge the history and come to terms with the fact that it was ending…at least this chapter.

"We should end it how it started," she finally said, leaning in. He kissed her, and it was perfect. Everything fell into place. They weren't going to burn the bridge, and they weren't going to cross it. They were both going to turn and walk away from it, but never really forget where the bridge was. She started her car.

"Goodbye, Addison."

"Good bye, Mark."

And neither of them would have had it any other way.

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**Reviews, please!!!**


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